I need some urgent advice

Replies

By tired lady

Re: I need some urgent advice
Wed 9 Jan 2008 20:40

hi daniel
you can get financial benefit support for your family by applying for DLA
for your son with autism
your son with SEN ( you do not need a diagnosis to apply)

help your 19 year old son apply for DLA . Even if you have to fill in the form for him.

your 17 year old get him to apply for incapacity benefit

you can apply for carers allowance. you can only apply once even though you care for more than one person.
someone else in the family who helps can apply. if their circumstances are right.

you can apply for a blue badge for each individual who is disabled. which is very helpful. especially on hospital trips.

The Council can cap your water rates. due to a family member being incapacitated or disabled. ive just found that out recently.
you can apply for housing and council tax benefit.
if you have a morgage, their maybe support their too. I know my brother in law used to get help. check to see if the benefit still exists.

Social service help. seems to vary form county to county.
contact them and get as much help as you can.

I dont know what to say emotionally. i know how difficult it is. I have 3 autistic sons and husband with AS. I care for my aunt and I cared for my mother from a very young age until she passed away. im also dyspraxic myself .
ive filled in a lot of forms over the years and will being so for a very long time
i hope this helps

By Greebo

Re: I need some urgent advice
Thu 10 Jan 2008 00:28

In additon to what tired lady said:
Ask the CAB to help you work out what you'd get if you had to stop work (for health reasons?) compared to what you're getting now.

Given the stress you're under, it might be possible for you to take medical retirement, while at no point making your (v supportive) employer feel threatened with a lawsuit for making you crack up.

NB Ii'm not even suggesting that you give up the masters course, I'm assuming it's one of the things helping you stay sane!

IMHO finances are a lot easier to juggle than relationships and health , so if you have to choose, I'd ditch the job if I were you.

Carersline migh be able to help point you in the right direction, or at least offer a sympathetic ear - it's there on
Thursdays & Fridays, 10am-12, and 2-4pm. 0808 808 7777

By marie66

Re: I need some urgent advice
Thu 10 Jan 2008 06:40

hi get an appoinment with a welfare rights officer and soon!
They will be able to fill in the necessary forms for benefits and let you know what is available and they're good.
You can find a welfare rights worker at social services!

Social services may be able to offer you help in other ways too so definately ask about assessments of need for your family members and also a Carers assessment to be done.

I know it's difficult! full time work and caring, regardless of what DWP and people who ' DON'T' do this say it nigh on impossible!!

Good luck, the info is the key,

God bless,
marie x

By boots

Re: I need some urgent advice
Thu 10 Jan 2008 22:09

Hi,

My husband has an AVM and we find great help and support for this rare condition from AVMsupport.com

By dancred

Re: I need some urgent advice
Thu 10 Jan 2008 23:04

Thanks for all the help and advice. We've had a meeting with Social Services today and we will have an emergency meeting next week to discuss how they can help us. I'm also now off work sick as I just can't balance it all. We do get DLA for my wife and 10 year old.
About the AVM - both my wife and my 19 yr old son have an AVM. My wife's is inoperable and was discovered after she had a haemorrhage when she was 19. It's left her with epilepsy and severe migaraines. My son's was only discovered through an MRI last year when he presented with seizures. The remarkable thing is that my wife and son are not related by blood. He is my first wife's natural son.The chances of that must be very slim.
Daniel

By Paula W

Re: I need some urgent advice
Wed 23 Jan 2008 17:55

hi daniel there is a service called ILF - independant living fund or their is crossroads ILF gives you money so you can employ carers to help you with your workload crossroads are carers that come in the home to help it might be worth a mention to your social worker and if you do not have a social worker you may want to ask for one i know we moan about social workers but you need one to do referals for the services i hope this helps you as you really do need some support with all you have to do as if you have a breakdown due to your load you will not be fit to care at all , i really do wish you all the luck in the world and i do hope you get all the support you need , you deserve it love xx

By tracyG

Re: I need some urgent advice
Thu 24 Jan 2008 12:23

Hi,

Youv'e been given lots of wise and good first hand advice, my problems are different to yours but I too was trying to manage working and studying as well as looking after a family of five, two with disabilities.

I have had to stop all that I'm doing before I have a break down myself.

If you are not well, then how indeed are you all going to cope then. I stopped because what is important to me is my family the rest you can cope with, it will be hard, but give it time seek out all the help you can possibly get, don't be shy about letting them know the nitty gritty, they need to hear that so that you get somewhere, keep your chin up and eventually it will given time get easier and you will then cope better.
Take care.

By papanna

Re: I need some urgent advice
Thu 24 Jan 2008 16:48

try the Princess Royal Trust they have centres where there are people who might be able to help you. I have just recently joined and they have already suggested a stress management course for me.

By Paula W

Re: I need some urgent advice
Sat 26 Jan 2008 21:03

which area are you as you could do to get in touch with a parent carers support centre , i do home visit etc for the elderly parent carers still caring for their adult child i work for a parent carers support centre they are great places you know there that your not alone having to cope and they help you with everything worth a try!

By welfare

Re: I need some urgent advice
Thu 7 Feb 2008 16:57

You can also get a Council Tax Band reduction if you require a room for the treatment of any of your family who reside at home.