keeping your head when all about you seems to be out of control

Replies

By mag

Re: keeping your head when all about you seems to be out of control
Tue 13 Nov 2007 20:07

Hello Gracelove

Just want to say "Welcome" I look after my hubby and like you, for many years I did not know that what I was doing meant I was a Carer.

You will find support and lots of information on this site. There is also the chat room where you can "meet" others - there are usually people in the chat room from 7.30p.m onwards

Hope to see you there soon. - Mag

By morello

Re: keeping your head when all about you seems to be out of control
Mon 19 Nov 2007 15:43

You really have to take each day at a time or the stress would really cause you depression. There are a lot of us here isn the same boat, which the way things are going for carers feels like we are rapidly sinking. This is a good site though and you can trust others and the advice given, unlike some other sites so do beware which ones you join
Mo

By gracelove

Re: keeping your head when all about you seems to be out of control
Mon 19 Nov 2007 18:15

Thank you mo. Bless you.

Yes I havee been diagnosed with depression... Doc gave me some antis but they're not the answer for me. You are right, too much stress gives way to depression. And Yes I do feel that I am in a sinking boat... But am still bailing out as we speak. Water not yet over my head. I do take each day at a time but since I had my hysterectoomy last year I was plunged into an early change. and I feel that coupled with looking after my daughter with autism and being a single mum. has relly taken its toll. I do feel lighter knowing I am not the only person going through this stuff.

By gracelove

Re: keeping your head when all about you seems to be out of control
Mon 19 Nov 2007 18:59

Hi Mag and Mo,

I have tried to get in to live chat but cannot seem to access it. Help please. I must be doing something wrong. grace love

By adhd son

Re: keeping your head when all about you seems to be out of control
Mon 19 Nov 2007 20:58

HI Grace I am also new to site, I care for my 7 year old son with ADHD and totally understand how you must be feeling. I too have been given antidepressants. Sarah

By gracelove

Re: keeping your head when all about you seems to be out of control
Tue 20 Nov 2007 08:56

Hi, Sarah,

Its a struggle thats for sure. Its strange, cus when everything is going well, its almost euphoric but when we are low ,boy do we bump everything on the way down. My eldest daughters boyfriend has adhd, and i know how sometimes she can feel completely wound up by him, he takes a lot of patience and understanding.

Sarah, Im a believer in prayer, I will put you on my prayer list. take Care and have a good day.
Grace

By morello

Re: keeping your head when all about you seems to be out of control
Tue 20 Nov 2007 09:11

Hi to Grace please go back to your Gp as some of the new types of anti depressant drugs are not always suited to certain individuals. They can have nasty side effects so ask to try a different type.
I too am alone caring with autism and it is so hard that unless you have to deal with it, even professionals dont understand. Keep that chin of yours up above the water . You are not alone you just feel like it because the situation you are in dictates it. One day we will be recognised not as charity cases but as real people doing an extremely hard job under circumstances that would knock a normal person down. You are stronger than you think.
Mo

By saab

Re: keeping your head when all about you seems to be out of control
Tue 20 Nov 2007 17:23

hi im new 2 this as well i look after my mum some days i feel like im going insane but i love her. just feel at the mo i have no life of my own. when i feel like this i also feel selfish 4 thinking it.

By morello

Re: keeping your head when all about you seems to be out of control
Wed 21 Nov 2007 10:38

we all feel like this at times and remember we are only human it is normal. Where we once had a life with friends and jobs we are isolated with a lot of the time never seeing anyone from one end of the day to another, To say we never resent this at times would be a lie. Remember we all feel like this a lot of the time,it is because there is little or no help available to allow us to have even a normal day.
Mo

By Greebo

Re: keeping your head when all about you seems to be out of control
Sat 24 Nov 2007 09:52

How do I cope? One day at a time , or 5 minutes at a time on really bad days.

Sites like this, emailing lists and "The Selfish Pig's Guide to Caring" by Hugh Marriott all help a bit. It can be read in short bites if that's all you can manage, and it mentions a lot of the things which non-carers would rather not remember we have to deal with (sex, guilt, resentment, time, money, bureaucracy, incontinence, burnout, independance trap).