Discussion Boards I care for... Wife's work

Wife's work

By Husband Of Depression Sufferer

Mon 1 Feb 2010 11:21

Hi people.

Hope you’re all ok today and had a nice weekend.

Would be grateful for your thoughts.
My wife’s biggest issue and the one that she blames most for her depression (I have my doubts that this is the main reason) is that she is a stay at home mum and she isn’t able to find a job that fits in with school hours and holidays. She used to be a secretary and enjoyed her work before she gave up to have our son (now aged 9). She has a few based teaching qualifications which I believe qualifies to be a class room assistant in an adult education college. I appreciate that jobs that fit in with school hours and holidays are like gold dust and are very few and far between. She is a French national and a few people come to our house during the week for 1 to 1 tuition. My wife complains that she doesn’t have a lot of interaction with people and is bored at home.

She has sent countless Cvs to schools and applied for various part time roles but without success. I was thinking of placing a small lineage ad in the local newspaper (about once a month as it’s not cheap) saying: - employment sought…..

I keep telling her that it wont be long until my son can take himself to school and
that, that’ll open up more opportunities to her an eventually she’ll be free to go back to work full time. I’ve volunteered millions of time to be a house husband and to stay at home myself so she can go back to work but her excuse is that I’ll be useless doing the house work and cooking!! Granted, I’ve only spent 8 months of my 43 years living on my own and am not very well house trained but if it made her happy, I’d be more than willing to learn.

I’m just frustrated as I can’t see that there’s much more that I can do to help.
I’d be most grateful for any thoughts/views/advice.

Rob

Replies

By kerry.: Re: Wife's work
Mon 1 Feb 2010 11:29
Hi Rob,
theres nothing to stop your misses doing some voluntary work. that fits is as and wehn it suits her. I know people are always crying out for volunteers and she may feel more useful.
I know what she means about being stuck at home- it is like sticking needles in yer eyes a lot of the time.
I always went off and did some sort of voluntary work when things got too much at home.

By Husband Of Depression Sufferer: Re: Wife's work
Mon 1 Feb 2010 11:33
Thats Kerry that a thought
Take care

By mag

Re: Wife's work
Mon 1 Feb 2010 12:04

Hi Rob

Like Kerry, I thing voluntary work is a great idea and can be fitted in as time allows. What about part time study - do you have a college offering anything which might appeal to her?

Both suggestions, and there may be many others, would mean she is meeting new people and enjoying company. Another way to look at it - when your son is a little older and your wife is looking for a job, she would have more to add to her CV.

By postmanpat: Re: Wife's work
Mon 1 Feb 2010 13:05
Would there not be an opportunity to use her native language to open some doors for her? As an interpreter for the medical/legal services?
I agree with mag and kerry voluntary work is a real option. I have done a lot of voluntary work over the years and got tremendous satisfaction out of it and met some lovely people to boot. Does she swim or like the gym ? This could give her an interest to meet other people and start the ball rolling to help with the depression.
It is difficult I know as I suffered from it really badly once and have had friends who have been there too. I know I just wanted to stay on my own and shut everyone else out. So if she is wanting to get out and about this has to be encouraged surely.
Good luck anyway. x

By lynba2: Re: Wife's work
Mon 1 Feb 2010 15:00
hi has your wife tryed going to the school and asking if they need any help listening to the children read because sometimes this is the way into these jobs i know its not paid but you can get yourself recognised this way and any jobs that come up in these schools she would get to hear about first hand ive always wanted to work with disabled children but never had the qualifications they require ive tryed several time but it seems bringing up a child with cp dosnt give you any knowledge on how to help them so gave up too old now or i feel it to go get qualifications lol good luck with your wifes job search but it would get her out the house

By Bubbles

Re: Wife's work
Mon 1 Feb 2010 17:15

Hi,

I agree with lynba 2. I know of quite a few people who volunteered at their local school to do reading, cooking etc. When a teaching assistant came up they were the first to be asked to interview and usually got the jobs.!!!!

What about being a dinner lady?? Again it will get you a foot in the door so to speak and again you will get to hear of any jobs going.

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