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19 year old son with anxiety and aggression
- By TerriM
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Wed 30 Apr 2008 18:43
Hi - I would love some advice on how to manage my son who is awaiting CBT (its been months but we've been told 'it's not long now'). He has stopped his antidepressants but no longer gets incapacity benefit and hasn't signed on. He is getting in debt with his mobile and goes out every night drinking and smoking cannabis. We have paid for his driving lessons (he passed his test today) which has cost us a fortune. He now wants a car (of course) and expects us to magic one up (this is not going to happen!). He became really aggressive with me this pm as some workmen doing some gardening work for me used his friend's wheelbarrow which he'd left in the garden since last summer. He was chasing me around the house bellowing at me and swearing at me. It's getting scarey and intimidating. He wants to eat what he wants when he wants and helps himself to food whether or not I have plans for it. I feel like leaving as he seems to think that he is in control of me and my husband.
Replies
- By boots
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Re: 19 year old son with anxiety and aggression
Thu 1 May 2008 19:34Hi Terri whats CBT? My son is currently in a childrens home, he was 15 last week and is doing the things your son is and much more. I am trying to get him assessed, easier said than done. I have wanted to run away many times.Firstly you are a great mum and you can handle this, your son needs you. My sons trauma started after his dad became disabled, he says his dad died then and was replaced by a monster, I will be thinking of you, and know you are not alone.
- By juls
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Re: 19 year old son with anxiety and aggression
Fri 2 May 2008 14:49Hi Terry,
Has your son been assessed? if so have you had a carers assessment? I am only asking because you may get some training on how to deal with aggressive behaviour and learn to de-escalate situations. I know you love your son but please do not put yourself at risk, if you need to phone the police then phone them. sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind
- By loopy
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Re: 19 year old son with anxiety and aggression
Fri 2 May 2008 22:07hi there, sorry to be ignorant but what is CBT. Is that cognative behaviour therapy? does your son suffer from depression?Depression is a dreadful thing and can really pull you down. I know because i have been there. I care for my severely autistic daughter and it can really pull you down. You sound like a fantastic parents, but your son sounds like he desperately needs some help, bless him. I dont mean to sound presumptious but has your son been tested for bi polar disorder? thats a strong form of depression. I know that teenagers can be a real pain in the ass, god knows i have a 12 year old girl and an 18 year old boy as well and there aint nothing wrong with them!
but they really test the bounderies!! anyway i hope that you get the help for your son because he sounds like he desperately needs it. Its not just for him its for you as parents too. Things like this can drive a real wedge between you. DONT let it!! 
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