guilty?

Replies

By Shldvds

Re: guilty?
Fri 20 Oct 2006 22:38

Hi Maggymay, What you are feeling is perfectly natural and is
what most people in similar circumstances feel. It doesn't mean that you have let your Mum down in any way but does mean that you have tried your best to do what is right to ensure she gets the care she needs.
It will take time for both of you to adjust but ,hopefully, in the long term you will both realise that it was the right thing to do in your situations.
Take care and please try not to feel too guilty - because you aren't.
If you feel you need others to talk to please feel free to join us in the chat room. There's usually somebody in from around 7-30pm. and you would be very welcome. We laugh, we cry, we have fun and share each others pains and problems.
Please join us if you can. You will be very welcome.
Lots of love, Sheila.

By Lou120

Re: guilty?
Sat 21 Oct 2006 02:38

I'm just considering doing the same for my dad. I have an overwhelming feeling of guilt like i'm letting him down but I was thinking today that if something happens to him while he's home alone or he collapses with another stroke or heart attack I would feel more guilty that there was no one there looking after him x

By graham

Re: guilty?
Sat 21 Oct 2006 18:10

Oh Maggymay !.......Have no feelings of guilt......You have not let your Mum down at all. On advice you have placed your Mum in care. You visit her on a regular basis & clearly you love her.............There is nothing more you can do....Just carry on with your visits ( 3/4 times a week is about right ) twice a day unsettles them in my opinion ...... Give it time & it will work out.

By maggymay

Re: guilty?
Sat 21 Oct 2006 19:43

Just a humble thankyou to all of you "caring" people out there who took time to look and listen. In time it will no doubt get easier as pain at this level could not be endured in the long term. You may well be right Graham about the amount of visets but.......right now they are as much if not more for my benefit as they are for Mums.. Thankyou once again.

By Jean_M

Re: guilty?
Sun 22 Oct 2006 08:55

Don't feel guilty, you haven't let anyone down. Loving someone means doing the absolute best for them, however it makes us feel. You obviously do and you obviously have.
Come and join in the chatroom, as Sheila said, it's a very warm place to be.

By tina1

Re: guilty?
Tue 24 Oct 2006 02:17

god i,m sitting here crying...pleas3e dont feel guilty..

By mag

Re: guilty?
Tue 24 Oct 2006 13:51

I can identify with your experience , Maggymay, having been in the same position a number of years ago. You are a loving daughter trying to do the best possible for your mother - and of course you will feel guilty. However, give it time and gradually you and she will get accustomed to the change and, as you see her being cared for in a safe environment suited to her needs, you will come to accept that you have done the right thing.